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CabinMama.com

How to Say I Quit

04/11/2010

Ever dream about saying “I quit”?

Some of us fantasize about this, don’t we? Monday morning comes and we lay there looking up at the ceiling thinking, “What if I went in there today and told them to take this job and do you-know-what? I wonder what words I’d use?”

(This is where ALL the lawyers tell me to insert The BIG Disclaimer: “By virtue of writing this post, please be aware I’m not advocating, advising, suggesting or implying in even the most subtle or innocuous of ways you should quit your job!”)

**But just in case you want to take a mental road trip to celebrate the new work week, here are 30 key phrases people could use to say “I quit”!**

“It’s really important I spend more time with my family.” (Fired C-suite execs and out-of-favor politicians use this one)
“I’d like to pursue other opportunities.” (like fishing and golf)
“At this stage of my life, it’s time to smell the roses.” (or pansies, daffodils – maybe even the goldenrod too)
“You know that TV show, the Biggest Loser? Well, that’s how I feel around here, so it’s time to go!”
“I know you’re cutting costs, so allow me to take one for the team.”
“You know that next layoff you’re planning? Pulllease, take me, take meeeee!”
“9 out of 10 managers agree, I’m destined for bigger and better things.”
“No, really, it’s not YOU – it’s just me.”
“I did win the lottery – I did!”
“The Dali Lama says I’m needed on the mountaintop.”
“It’s haying season back on the farm.”
“You pay me far, far too much money for the work I do here. After I leave, you can spread the wealth around.”
“We’re trying to have a child, so I’m needed at home more often.”
“You know the other day when you asked me about my career goals…?”
“How would you like to save some budget money this year?”
“Where would you like me to put my computer?”
“How long does it take to do an exit interview?”
“I’m gifting you my chair.”
“I’m trading in my cubicle for an ocean view.”
“I have this cat and she needs a companion.”
“Paul Harvey made a fortune by closing his show with, ‘…and that’s the rest of the story’. I’m thinking it’s high time for my story to start!”
“I have this overwhelming urge for a Facebook page.”
“My mom always said, ‘If you can’t say something nice, then don’t say anything at all,’ so let me be brief.”
“According to the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, 15 million people are unemployed right now. Do you think one of them might qualify for my job?”
“You’re out of coffee.”
“You know that new guy down the hall? The guy with the pocket protector? He said he’s smarter than me, so now he gets a chance to prove it.”
“You cut the candy from the training budget.”
“The latest Rasmussen Report says 72% of Americans prefer ‘Merry Christmas’ to ‘Happy Holidays’, so an early ‘Merry Christmas’ to all, and to all a good night!”
“Those stock options are taking waaay too long to mature.”
“The voices in my head say it’s not safe for me to stay here anymore.”

I’m sure you can come up with a few good phrases of your own! Please feel free to share them with us in the comments below!

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12 Ways to Spot Your Personality Style

03/02/2010

I had a friend over one day. We had coffee. Her’s got cold and she asked if she could warm in the microwave.

I replied, “Of course”.

A few minutes later she rejoined me in the living room and said, “Your microwave doesn’t work right.”

I was confused. “But I just heard it running and your cup is steaming. What do you mean, it doesn’t work?”

She said, “Well, I put it in with the handle facing out and punched in the same number of seconds I normally do at home. But when I opened up the door to your microwave the handle was in the back. It’s supposed to end up facing out – towards me – so I can grab it.”

“So, that means there must be something wrong with my microwave.”

“Yup, you need to get it fixed.”

A short time later I shared this story with another friend. We got talking about how we eventually figured out our personality styles without having to take an assessment; we paid attention to the small things we did or thought about every day. Those were the clues.

“For example” she said, “I think about time very differently than other people.”

I asked her, “How so?” and she drew this picture…

“This is how I think about time. In my mind, January through May and September through December don’t take up as much space.”

(This was about the time I started searching for telltale signs of an alien abduction)

“But May through August takes up a LOT of space ’cause those months I want to last longer” she said.

I then asked, “But why would you do this? Time is time. Every day has 24 hours. We can’t fool ourselves into making it last longer.”

“I can,” she said. “Besides, I have to have a way to think about it that makes sense. I mean, how do YOU think about time? Don’t you have to have someplace to ‘put it’ in your mind so you can look to see where that month belongs?”

(By then I really knew she’d been swapped out with someone who just looked like her!)

“Nope. I don’t need to see a picture in my mind when I think about time. I just use it up!” I said.

“Well, I have to have a place to put things. It makes me feel organized” she said.

And then the light bulb came on! She is a process person. Her whole life is pretty darned organized. She has cubbyholes at her desk with neat little cubicles for pads of paper, pens, paper clips and even the stapler, for goodness sakes!

I have a drawer. One day I may take the time to organize it. That will probably save me a lot of time in the long run.

She has a recipe book she’s created over the years by pulling recipes out of magazines. It’s organized according to type of food: vegetable dishes, desserts, casseroles, etc. Her file folder labels are typed. (Mine are hand-written)

But those things are not that important to me. I spend my time in other ways. (Like trying to influence people with my sparkling wit! Ha!)

So now I’m on this “kick”. I ask folks how they know their personality style from the day-to-day stuff they do. And here’s what they tell me…

I space the hangers in my closet so they’re exactly half an inch apart
I organize the food on my plate in the order I’m going to eat it – clockwise
I never balance my checkbook; I just check online to see if there’s still money left in the account
I have to leave two or three voice mail messages when I call someone ’cause those darned recorders never give you enough time to say what you need to say
I have to have the garbage can cleaned out – I hate the thought of it being all smelly when the garbage collectors come
I carved out foam containers to fit my tools exactly – and I’ve labeled each one
People just don’t know how to load a dishwasher properly! I’m always having to go and re-arrange things after my ______ (fill in the blank: spouse, kids, mother in law) loads it
Co-workers say I’m like a bull in a china shop; things just get bumped and knocked over when I’m around
I eat at the sink; it takes too much time to sit down

See anything you can relate to on that list?

So, here’s the slam-bang finish and the primary way to learn more about your personality style:

It’s all about motivation. Ask yourself WHY you do the things you do.

Do you get back in your car and move it when you realize you parked it all screwy? I might not bother because parking ‘outside the lines’ isn’t a big deal for me, UNLESS it’s a crowded parking lot. Then I might be worried I’d keep someone else from being able to squeeze in. If there are a lot of people nearby, I might move the car because I don’t want to look like a dork! But I never, EVER, move my car because parking inside the lines is the RIGHT WAY to park it!

How about you? Care to share a few items on your list? How do you know what personality style you have?

And while we’re waiting, please excuse me while I go microwave my coffee!

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Life Skills and Leadership Lessons Learned in Basic Training

02/19/2010

My daughter decided to enlist in the Air Force and I’m very proud of her! I think it’ll be good for her growth as a person and help build character and resilience – although she’s a pretty spunky young lady as it is!

I learned a lot from my seven years in the Air Force, especially basic training! I remember pulling in to Lackland Air Force Base in San Antonio, Texas at 2am. Some big, loud guy jumped up through the door of the bus and yelled, “Alright, ladies!” (even though 90% of my companions were male) “Up and out! Line up!” Then he shouted, “Up against the wall!” (In that first phone call back home I told my Mom I was scared silly; I wasn’t sure what was coming next!)

But I have fond memories and realize now how much I learned about life and leadership during those eight grueling weeks. (I can hear my Marine and Army friends snickering at me right now…”Grueling, Laura? You can’t even GUESS what grueling feels like!”)

Ahem! Okay, so as I was saying…here’s what I learned:

You “earned your clothes”. New uniforms were added to our “wardrobe” as we progressed through each week of training. Wearing them hinged on achieving certain milestones and we didn’t get to wear our dress blues until the end. Wearing the next set of clothes was a privilege you earned. (And just in case you’re wondering, we did not start out naked!) Lesson learned: what’s worth having is worth working for. You have to prove you’re worthy, qualified and ready for the responsibility. It might be hard to wait for the “goodies”, but you need to know how to handle it so you don’t cause yourself (or others) harm if things come too fast and easy.

Peer pressure was a powerful tool. If one lady wanted to put her sweater on, she knew we’d ALL have to put our sweaters on. So we learned to make decisions and requests keeping the needs of the entire team in mind. Lesson learned: It’s never just about you; your actions end up impacting others. Even if you think this one decision is a small one and you make it behind closed doors in the dark of night, it’s possible the ripple effect will be felt elsewhere. Sometimes having a strong support structure (family, faith, community) helps us tow the line through our weaker moments.

The team had to move as one. Marching 101 required you pay attention to the person beside you, in front of and behind you. You took your cues from each other with one goal – to move as one. If you got out of step, you’d “skip” to match pace. If your stride started bouncing, you’d have to regain control and settle back down. Typically a whisper from the person behind you, “you’re bouncing” would snap you back into form. Lesson learned: Teams, boards, councils and parents should speak with “one voice” and act as one. We may not agree with the direction the group wants to take, but at some point you have to choose whether being part of the group and supporting them is more important. Sometimes it’s not. Sometimes you are the lone voice in the wilderness, fighting against groupthink. You’ll know when it’s worth it to push back based on what’s at risk if you don’t.

We were all in it together. At first, there were the few who were totally unprepared for the shock of basic training. Their recruiters hadn’t been straight with them and they whimpered at night under the covers. But gradually the group started to bond. We helped one another through tough times and watched for ways to ease the burden for some who struggled. Lesson learned: Helping others distracts folks from their own worries. In the book, The Survivors Club: The Secrets and Science that Could Save Your Life, author Ben Sherwood cites studies that prove doctors, nurses and emergency response people tend to survive catastrophes, not because they are medically trained, but because they don’t allow emotional despair to get the best of them. They have a purpose and people with purpose have more will to survive.

No talking to men in the first 10 days. I’m still not sure what that one was all about! I’m certain it had something to do with instilling yet MORE discipline – squelching those animal instincts and all. So, I broke that rule the first week.

I tried to avoid the tall, handsome guy who kept chasing me around the aisle at the small BX (general store), but he was pretty determined! I kept dodging him until he slipped me a note that said, “Aren’t you Sandy’s friend from Rochester NY? I’m her old boyfriend!”

Sheesh! I didn’t recognize him with no hair! He turned out to be one of only two people I knew from home and it was hard to say good bye when he and Charlie shipped out a week before I did. Lesson learned: friends from home are worth their weight in gold!

I’m sure my daughter will get through basic training with her own set of “lessons learned”. I’m just hoping the lessons that squelch those “instincts” stick the best!

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